Getting ready for work used to be so easy. If you woke up late, meaning 15 minutes before you’re supposed to leave for work - no biggie. You showered the night before, so just brushing your teeth, slapping on some mascara and putting your hair in a ponytail was enough. You’d end up at work looking smart and tidy and no one would be the wiser.
After you have a kid everything changes. Waking an hour before you’re meant to leave the house is too late. First of all showering the night before is a luxury. If you manage to stay awake after putting baby to sleep, you call it an accomplishment. Doing one of 10 million things that still need to be done, is a really productive evening.
Showering? What’s that? And you begin to wonder why we wasted so much space in the house on bathrooms.
In the morning, a 2 minute shower may still be an option - only if the baby is still asleep. If not….another smelly day at work and a whole bunch of bargaining…
First of all, your playful child thinks its the perfect time for a puzzle. So she picks up a 100 piece, nonetheless, empties it all out on the floor in an attempt to do it herself. But…mommy must watch! If you manage to pry yourself away just long enough to grab the first thing you see in your closet you’ll be half way to going downstairs.
Then its time to dress your princess. Now, the days of picking out whatever you wanted and putting it on her are long gone. Your toddler has a very strong mind of her own and knows exactly what she wants. And what she wants is for everything to be the same colour. Whatever that colour may be. So putting on a white top and blue shorts is not good enough. She starts pointing to her socks and shorts saying: “Mommy, it’s not the same! I want same-same!” Pointing to the two things that are not the same. But look, your socks are the same as your top and your shorts are the same as you shoes conversation ensues and you just pray to God that she will accept today’s combination. And she does, after a bit of convincing and making sure that, in that case, the hairband is blue as well. Thank God, because you have no idea where the blue socks are.
Once we leave the chaos of undone beds and scattered puzzle pieces, its time for breakfast. Breakfast is a gamble of its own… you hope that seating arrangements won’t be an issue today, that instead of cereal with milk or as she calls it “cookie mleko” she’ll settle for a cheese sandwich on the go. And if not, just dry “cookies” in a bowl will still do.
Scrambling for keys, bags, wet wipes is the climax just before you step out the door.
And this, my friends, is my usual morning routine since I’m always late to wake up.
So if you ever see me in the street, with my hair in a mess, no make up and a strange smell is suddenly coming from somewhere, just know… I’ve had a rough morning, so please cut me some slack.